Monday, August 29, 2016

Personal Reflections

It is very important to be honest to oneself. In the madness of our day to day life, when we hear advice, thoughts, opinions from thousands of voices around us, it is very easy to get lost and pursue a path that does not make us happy but rather makes society happy and feel comfort in its order of things. Discovering your personal calling in the middle of all this chaos, noise, depressive thoughts of people can be difficult. Sometimes, it takes near-death experiences or deep personal tragedies to discover one’s mission in life, the true calling. But such incidents are not really welcome and can’t be planned for. In absence of these incidents, the best way to discover one’s calling to is to have diverse experiences, meet diverse people with thoughts different than yours, reflect often and to keep an open mind during the process. It is important to have the courage to not do what society and people expect you to do and what may seem “right” and “orderly”, but to follow your heart.  

Second important lesson I learnt is that character and ethics are everything. To accomplish anything substantial in life requires support and help from good people. Best people come to those who they can trust and know are inherently good, selfless and have strong values. To gain trust of others, be a good leader or build long lasting relationships with people, require one to be committed to the success of others. In order to selflessly help others, one should not be insecure about his/her own professional and personal standing, should not get jealous by the success of those he/she helps and feels happy in the success of others. It takes hundreds of personal interactions to build trust, but just one incident of taking advantage, howsoever small, of somebody or not being honest and fair, to break it. Most startups fail because either the founders cannot trust each other, or the exec team leaves feeling unsatisfied or unfairly treated fairly. Flattery never helps either. Rather there is tremendous value in being direct and honest even when it implies being controversial or saying something which the other person may not like/agree with. People feel comfortable and like being with folks who they know are the same inside as they appear outside. They don’t need to spend their thought cycles figuring out a person really means, and in the event of lack of such clarity, human nature is to always assume that what is really inside is much worse that what appears outside. 

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Lone Journey

You enter this world alone and leave the world alone,
Besides for a few companions here and there, the journey is majorly your own
You meet some people on your way, but just for a short duration,
And they disappear from your life, only to meet maybe in the next salvation
One day you cry, one day you smile
One day you halt, one day you walk a mile
One day you lose hope, one day you dream
One day you dance, one day you scream
Amidst this ever changing state of mind and inner call
You wonder what is the point of it all
Life becomes a maddening journey oscillating between ecstasy and pain
Without a higher purpose, how can you remain sane
Life destroys you at times, stripping you of all your joys and hope
And laughs at you after tying you in a rope
You fight hard to keep moving, wiping your tear
You grow a thick skin, losing touch with your emotions and fear
You keep moving, without realizing where you are going
After all it's all about winning the fights and keeping the ball rolling
Just when you think you've got it all figured and you're just fine
A breathtaking sunset shows you a peek into life's true purpose and shine
You finally begin to look within for answers and clarity
And realize that life is not a struggle, but an inner journey to infinity


Thursday, January 23, 2014

Synopsis on Friedrich Nietzsche's work

Here is the term paper I submitted for a course, titled Philosophy of Life, at IIT Bombay about 2 years back. It gives a synopsis of Friedrich Nietzsche's work, "The Gay Science". ("Gay" standing for happiness here). 

Introduction:

The Gay Science has many interesting things to say about moral values, religion, and psychology; it centers on a discussion of epistemology. What Nietzsche wants is a "science" which is free-spirited, joyful, and life-affirming. The title signifies a propensity towards rigorous practice of a poised, controlled, and disciplined quest for knowledge, and is typically translated as "science". The book is usually placed within Nietzsche's middle period, during which his work extolled the merits of science, skepticism and intellectual discipline as routes to mental freedom. 
 
This book is a kind of merry-making after long privation and powerlessness, the rejoicing of strength that is returning, of a reawakened faith in a tomorrow, of a sudden sense and anticipation of a future, of impending adventures. Only great pain is the liberator of the spirit, which compels us to descend into our ultimate depths and to put aside all trust, everything good-natured, everything that would interpose a veil, that is mild – things in which we formerly may have found our humanity. Nietzsche's concept of "science" represents a revolution.

Book 1
 
In this book, Nietzsche has argued that humans instead of following someone or some principle blindly, need to form their own beliefs about the meaning of life and their existence. Most people lack “intellectual conscience” and believe things without questioning and reasoning. Nietzsche contrasted the noble and common, individual and herd based on this idea. He also challenged the traditional idea of the good and evil. Following of traditional principles without challenging is considered good, whereas what is new and speculative is considered evil. He considers appearance as a dream-state and this notion elevates its status. 
 
The teachers of the purpose of existence
According to Nietzsche, all humans are involved in a single task of doing what is good for the preservation of the human race. This instinct of race preservation is the essence of our species. The herd mentality has given rise to the proposition that “the species is everything, one is always none”. The moralities and religions promote the life of the species by promoting faith in life; that life is worth living. Many teachers of existence come and go (defeated by reason, laughter or nature) who try to instill faith in life and its meaning and make sure that we do not laugh at existence itself. Human nature has been changed by these teachers so such as extent that now there is an additional need for the ever new appearance of such teachers and teachings of a purpose.

What preserves the species
Usually people hold this notion that what is called good preserves the species, while what is called evil harms the species. Nietzsche argues that in reality the strongest and most evil spirits and not the good ones have advanced humanity and relumed the passions that were going to sleep. Order puts society to sleep, which is awakened by contradictions, comparisons and pleasures in what is new, daring and untried. On the contrary, the good men are those who dig old thoughts; what is new is considered evil. 
This section highlights Nietzsche’s opposition to the simplistic Utilitarian theory of good and bad. 

On the doctrine of the feeling of power
Benefiting and hurting others are just ways of exercising one's power over others. 
We show benevolence to those who subdue to our power. We show them that it is advantageous to be under our power and they become willing with their condition and fight again the enemies of our power. Out of these two ways, pain is more efficient means to power than pleasure, since pain always raises the question of its origin while pleasure is inclined to stop with itself without looking back. Even though we may offer sacrifices for benefiting or hurting others; but all these sacrifices do not stand on their own but are backed by the purpose of promoting one's own power.
Pain is a more extreme means for promoting power; only the frustrated, irritable and covetous devotees of the feeling of power use it. For them, the sight of the objects of benevolence is a burden or boredom. Which means to select is a personal choice and depends on one's temperament – whether one prefers the slow or the sudden.
Nietzsche compares the proud natures with those who little pride. An easy prey is contemptible for proud ones. They feel good at sight of unbroken men who might become their enemies and at the sight of all possessions that are hard to come by. On the other hand, pity is found only in those with little pride. An easy prey is enchanting for them. 

Evil
Hindrances such as misfortune and external resistance, hatred, jealousy, avarice and violence are considered evil or not belonging to favorable conditions. But without these evils any growth of virtue is scarcely possible. These poisons which destroy the weaker natures actually strengthens the strong and the strong do not even call them poison.

Changed tastes
It is the change in tastes of some influential people rather than opinions that are more powerful. Opinions which rely on proofs, refutations and arguments are merely symptoms of the change in taste. The general taste is changed by some powerful people who shamelessly announce the judgment of their taste and enforce it tyrannically. And the reasons why their individual tastes changed are trivial, such as some oddity in their lifestyle, nutrition, digestion or in their physis. They have courage to side with their instincts to the subtlest nuances, whereas the herd which just follows their taste is contemptible. : Nietzsche criticize the general crowd which succumbs its reasoning and judgment to the subtlest nuances of physis of these powerful people and follows them blindly.

The things people call love
Nietzsche compares the feeling of love with avarice. Both the feelings originate in our desires for possession for new things. We derive pleasure in ourselves by changing something new into ourselves; that is what possession means. Love is nothing but an attempt to take possession of someone else. 
Friendship: But there is a higher feeling of continuation of love in the form of friendship.  In friendship, there is a possessive craving of two people for each other, which gives way to a shared higher thirst for an ideal above them. This feeling of possession, unlike sexual love, does not exclude the whole world and demand sole authority over the beloved.

Against remorse
Nietzsche contrasts the independent thinker with a follower. A thinker indulges in experiments and questions and these are attempts to find out something. The success and failure that he encounters are his answers after all. Hence, there is no reason for the feeling of remorse on a failure to emerge.
A follower who receives orders, on the other hand, gets annoyed and feels remorse when something goes wrong and has to reckon with a beating when his lordship is not satisfied with the result.

Work and boredom
Nietzsche offers some rare insights into modern industrial society. In knightly society there was value in what men sought to do; in industrial society men do what they do (work) merely to be paid. Value, in effect, has become alienated --- from inner desires and needs to outer currencies. The plight of the modern worker is humiliating.
Today people look for work just for money. Thus, work becomes a means to getting paid rather than an end in itself. These people do not even care much for the choice of their work, if only it pays well. Nietzsche considers these people contemptible. It is better to perish without money than to work without any pleasure. People should be choosy about their work and should not care for rewards because the work itself should be a reward. 
There are two kinds of people who do not work unless it gives them pleasure. The first kind is the artists and contemplative men of all kinds and the second kind are the men of leisure. They desire work only if it is associated with pleasure. Otherwise, they choose to remain idle even if it means impoverishment, dishonor and danger to life and limb. They do not fear boredom as much as work without pleasure. Rather, the thinkers consider boredom as something which precedes a happy voyage, which must be borne. Boredom signifies a long and deep calm of the soul which requires patience.

On the suppression of the passions
If one continuously suppresses expression of one’s passion, thinking that it is something to be left to the commoners, the result is the weakening and alteration of the passion. In such cases, passions themselves get replaced by graceful, shallow and playful manners. It gives rise to a fake society where even an insult is accepted and returned with obliging words. Nietzsche sees delight in genuine passions and not fake manners. 

The argument of growing solitude
It is surprising that the reproaches of our own conscience are weaker that those by the society. We care more about the morals and norms of society than our own conscience. Even the strongest of people are fearful of a cold look or a sneer on the face of others. The argument that they give for behaving this way is that they are afraid of growing solitude. This is an indication of the herd instinct.

What others know about us
Nietzsche reinforces his point of basic herd instinct in humans by arguing that our happiness is not primarily dependent on what we know about ourselves but rather on what others know about us.  It is easier to cope with bad conscience but harder to cope with bad reputation.


CONCLUSION
The following is a central idea in the book 1: Nobility of mind is hard won and rarely celebrated by people at large. "It involves the use of a rare and singular standard and almost a madness: the feeling of heat in things that feel cold to everybody else; the discovery of values for which no scales have been invented yet; offering sacrifices on altars that are dedicated to an unknown god; a courage without any desire for honors; a self-sufficiency that overflows and gives to men and things." 
Through the use of various aphorism and dichotomies such as noble and common, good and evil, herd and individual, Nietzsche has successfully and very profoundly conveyed this idea. He has adopted the anthropological point of view. We have to know humans from the very roots, from the most basic herd instincts. He has highlighted how we lie to ourselves and need to know why we exist, leading to formation of many false constructions. Nietzsche demands an intellectual conscience, appreciation and a need for newness and regeneration.

Sunday, September 22, 2013

"Maids not allowed"

As some of you might know that I have changed my job and moved to India from the US. After having stayed for a year in the US, the first few days back in India were a bit difficult. I have spent my entire life in India and probably I should not crib like a first time return NRI. But I never really realized the shortcomings of living in India until I had lived in the US. It was an eye-opener. I strongly believe that India is a great country and every Indian has a thousand things to be proud of. But there are some things that bother me and I sincerely hope they change in my lifetime.

I think Indians have not truly gotten over the age old caste system. Today also, the respect we give to a person largely depends on his economic, social, racial and regional status. I was taken aback by a sign board on a restroom in a prestigious club in South Bombay reading, "Maids not allowed". This discrimination on economic and professional basis is a fair ground to sue the club in my opinion. People from backward sections are ill-treated, discriminated against and paid minimal wages that fail to ensure a decent quality of life. Our society is not a flat and fair one where all members deserve equal rights and respect, but rather it is a hierarchical society where god men sit at the top along with the super rich and powerful people who might have amassed their wealth through corruption. We do not judge a person by his values and ideas, but by factors which might be beyond his control. People think it is perfectly fine to ask others a personal question like what their salary is as they subconsciously or in most cases consciously want to judge them based on how many mulahs they earn. This is a country where a film star doesn't think twice before misbehaving with a security man doing his job and where a policeman cannot dare to arrest a politician. In contrast, in the US, a policeman has the power and courage to arrest even the mayor of a city. In a room full of people from all walks of life, the one who gets most respect is one who has the highest thoughts, or in the case of US, one who has the best sense of humor and not the most affluent person.

India is a country of few resources and huge demand. When 1.2 billion people compete for scarce resources, they tend to get desperate and begin to care less for values and ethics. Signs such as breaking queues, paying bribes, taking shortcuts, corruption etc. all point to this. In this competitive space, regard for a fellow being and values are of minimal importance; the main concern is survival and obtaining those sought after resources. Highly imbalanced wages in the working population and concentration of power to a small section of people seem to be ways to articulate the scant resources to a privileged few. People sometimes get so desperate in their struggles that they do not even stop and give help to a person injured in a road accident or even fail to give way to a passing ambulance.

India is a place of strong cultural heritage and has given birth to major religions, schools of high thoughts and great and inspirational men and women. We need to look within and think hard on where we are going and what have become of our core values.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

India - My home

The crowd, the noise, the peeking-into-neighbors'-personal-matters, the flies, the mosquitoes, the dirt, the scorching sun, the simple but street smart people - I am going to miss them all! I have lived in Europe and America for sometime and am fully aware of the million reasons why Indians flock there. But just like any other form of love, the love for one's country does not overlook the shortcomings, but rather celebrates them. I am set to go to the US for possibly next four years (at least). I still cannot imagine how will rains be as delightful as they are in India on speck-free roads of the US without creating the muddy mess, how will driving be so enjoyable with the lane system and no cutting paths and finding shortcuts, how will I be able to spend the festival days in the US away from my family and how will I feel missing my friends' weddings because I cannot come to India.

I have talked to people who have returned back to India after spending many years in US. The reason they give for returning is none of the above; it is for the family.

P.S. I am currently reading Shantaram and have fallen in love again with Bombay.

(Written before leaving for US)

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Real World

It has been around a year since I last blogged. I graduated from college and stepped into the so called "real world". A lot has changed since then; my outlook, some relationships, my country of residence, my work etc. and one post is not enough to capture it all. There are things which I hold on to that luckily haven't changed much, at least not yet. It seems the "real" in "real world" stands for the real problems that people face, as opposed to the seemingly big, but actually shallow problems they face in schools and colleges. A big part of stepping into the real world is taking responsibility towards one's family, work, career and in later stages kids. It is easy (or difficult from someone else's point of view) to live an isolated life, without any constraints or responsibilities. Growing up means sometimes keeping your own priorities below others', doing things you might not like much but have to do nevertheless and being accountable.

Real world also means you have power; biggest of which is the power of choice. You can choose what to buy, where to work, with whom to hang out with, who to care about, where to spend time etc. This gives us the power over our life; we sit in the driving seat of our life. We even have power over the company we work at; we have the power to change it for good or bad. We have power over the people we interact with. We have power over our relationships. We have power over our money and time. The real in 'real world' does stand for the real problems but rather real power. We need to be aware of this power and accept the responsibility that comes with it. Greatness comes from acquiring, nurturing and living up to the expectations of great power. When dealing with the intricacies of this power and responsibility, we are alone. We do not have teachers and parents to tell us what to do and how to do it. Yes, we do have the support of our mentors, friends and family, but beyond a certain point, we are alone. We are free to make our own choices and live their consequences. We learn to be independent. Real world tests our real self. The real world (and not the test results of various exams) is the real test of how well we were trained in our "non-real" world. An achievement is lot more sweeter and a failure lot more painful in the real world as they both stem from independent selves. The true support comes from within, from knowing one self, one's strengths, weaknesses, dreams, passions, fears, desires and powers. 

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Gurgaon

I am doing an internship in an e-commerce startup here in Gurgaon. It was mainly the three months of boredom at home and a desire to do some non-technical, business related work that brought me here (I would have preferred working in Bombay, but didn't get a similar opportunity there).

On the work side, I worked in the company's warehouse for first 10 days - trying to structure the quality control part of supply chain. I am currently working on customer order cancellations and customer feedback in collaboration with call center executives and mainly doing some data analysis, trying to find actionable business points. I also worked on finding the efficiency of the supply chain (obtaining cycle time, bottlenecks etc.) In the beginning, the work didn't seem interesting at all. But as time passed and more responsibility was given to me, it turned out to be a pretty good experience. The best part about it is I am given small and diverse projects in different departments to give me a good overall picture of the startup. 

On the fun side, it has been great! Visited delhi twice; delhi food is awesome (paranthe wali gali in Chandi Chowk, ice pan in CP particularly), went to IIT Kanpur once to meet my brother. There are many people from IITB here in Gurgaon. I am staying with my crazy school friend here. My flatmates are very cool - there is one who is a travel addict and has been taking me around, one who has switched 7 jobs in 3 years and one with a very cute dog. I also once lost my wallet and finally caught the thief by tracing through the CCTV camera footage (details below).

So, in all it has been a mixed experience. I would have preferred better working hours, better work culture and a non-sexist city! But sitting in my office and pondering about the past month, I have realized that there were quite many good things that I got to experience - thorough knowledge about a company's operations, living in apartments with strangers-at-first-friends-to-be, my first house party (dancing and drinking; well coke for me), pub culture and living with a pet dog! After having lived in a city as dangerous as Gurgaon, I suppose this gives one some confidence of come-what-may-we'll-survive. 

Wallet Incident: One evening in food court, I suddenly realized that my wallet was not with me. I remembered taking cash out from it an hour back. I searched all places where we went in last hour, thoroughly, taking help of security personnel there. After searching for half an hour, I had given up hope on finding it back. Then my friend suggested to go to the control room in the basement of the building and see the CCTV recordings. 

The person incharge (let's call him RH) was very cooperative. He let us enter the control room. It resembled those shown in movies - multiple screens showing different parts of the buildings and many control buttons. We scanned through the past hour's recordings. We traced our movements, focusing on who were in close proximity to us to steal, at which points I had my wallet and where I was seen without it etc. Finally, RH spotted a guy hovering around us and finally picking up the wallet I had forgotten while sitting on the stairs. But the recording didn't show the guy's face properly to identify. Again, we traced his movements through various cameras to get a better look. RH identified him as working in a nearby place. Then, we went and caught the guy and I got back my wallet. We left then, didn't wait to find out what they did with him (after all it was Gurgaon and best to avoid trouble)